Being an authoritative son

I have several younger siblings, four to be exact. If I had it my way, I would have had my parents have just me, wait fifteen years, and then have my baby sister, Noa. Noa is cute, adorable, sweet, and very unannoying. The age gap between us is perfect, where I can focus on her and her on me until we get tired of each other and then all is still fine because she's still cute. That, however, is not the case and my parents have a couple more kids to parent.

I do not believe that my parents always do an adequate job of parenting, often even requiring assistance. There have been times when decisions have been so off, there's no doubt in my mind they merely wanted me to offer my advice and were too proud to admit it. Luckily for them, I'm always happy to offer my support and expertise and will give them a piece of my mind without them having to ask.

It is important when dealing with my parents to not be too assertive. When my younger sister shouts "No!!!!!! How dare you! I do everything and you can at least take me to the____" in a very loud and inappropriate voice, I handle the situation carefully. I do not go to my mother/father and say in a cold, unwieldy tone, "go now and punish. Do it immediately. This is what you HAVE to do!" That would be too much negative vibe and would be too assertive. No, instead I employ authoritative measures to get them to see sense. I ask, "can she be talking to you like that? Wouldn't it be good to teach her a lesson? I've heard that research suggests the best way to punish your child in this situation is to (insert latest research here)." It is important that I don't talk to them too condescendingly because otherwise they won't do it. It's also very important that I do speak to them, because otherwise they will think that behavior is just allowed and they won't know what to do in the future, when I'm not there to help them along.

At times, the position can be quite trying. Having to mentor your own parents on parenting can bea burden and there are times that I want escape. But that's what I push through; it's what I fight. Just like a parent can't leave their child until they're ready, I can't leave my parents until they're ready to be caring alone. Until they can give my other sister the independence that she needs to grow and send her to the school that I know would be best for her. It's up to me to care for them.